The problem is I’m happy

I have a crazy girl crush on Jillian Michaels.

 

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My roommate and I watched The Biggest Loser religiously when she was on it. We. Loved. Her. She was intense and to the point but then she also had this knack for really connecting emotionally with her clients when they needed it. I am OBSESSED with her.

I heard from another blog I stalk read that she had a weekly podcast and thought I’d check it out. Honestly, I didn’t think it would entertain me. 45 minutes of talking with no pretty pictures or cartoons? What is this, radio? 1920? The dark ages?

Don’t take that personally, Mom. You’re still young at heart.

Qualms aside, I decided to download a few podcasts for my listing pleasure, AKA to survive the two 3-hour art classes I had to take junior year of college. Fartsy I am not.

Turns out, I luuuuuurve this podcast. It did nothing but add to my out-of-control girl crush of Jill. The lady is talented, ridiculously smart in her field, a total hottie, and insanely insightful when it comes to matters of the heart and mind, as well. I know, you don’t expect hugs and kisses from our girl Jill, and while she doesn’t go that far, she is far more emotional than I thought! She knows what’s up.

Anyway, since I started my new job, I have a 20 minute commute every morning which I’ve dedicated to smoothie/coffee drinking (sometimes both if I’m feeling crazy), and listening to The Jillian Michaels Show.

This is such a great way to start my day, I can’t even tell you. There’s a ton of awesome information, but there’s also a glimpse into Jillian’s personal life (she and her partner are the new mom’s of TWO bebe’s within ONE year; yeah I know, as if you needed another reason to bow down), and some hilarious banter between her and the show’s producer, Janice. Janice is Canadian, which immediately makes her hilarious in my book. If there is anything funnier than a funny American, it’s a Canadian. I hope that doesn’t come across as racist because I’m dead serious. I smile every time she pronounces a word with an “o,” and I love her funny little one liners. In the podcast I listened to today (I am severely behind) she said “a kick in your giggle,” which is like when Americans say “a kick in your step.” Except 100x times more hilarious. And then Jillian always goes after her sayings like a jerk, but it’s charming at the same time…

…I think I need to retract my I-have-a-crush-on-Jillian statement and add and-Janice…

Anyway.

Today’s podcast was about something that I think a lot of people struggle with: being happy. That sounds super dumb, right? Like, when you’re happy, that’s awesome. That’s not a problem. It’s pretty rockin’. We work hard, we have setbacks, and then we’re happy and life is perfect.

Except it’s not. Because raise your hand if you work your butt off and everything aligns and life is pretty freaking amazing and suddenly you find yourself cowering a corner, waiting for the sky to fall.

Because we all know that for every good thing to happen to you, a bad thing is coming too. And the more good things, well, the more bad things that are just around the corner.

Right?

NO!

I totally fall into this crap trap. I’ve had a super amazing year.

Spend J-term in Italy eating my way through Rome, Florence and Assisi, while simultaneously losing 3 pounds (seriously, I don’t even know):

Check.

Supa cool guy puts a ring on it:

Checkity check check.

Turn 21 without dying:

 

Yup.

Have adorable doghter:

Graduate Cum Laude from university in 3 years with 2 majors:

Boom.

Open parttime small business so I can do what I love in my spare time:

Boom shaka laka.

Land my dream job before I have a diploma in my hand:

Woop woop.

I’m not oblivious to the fact that my 2012 was pretty bomb. In fact, I’m extremely aware of it. So aware, in fact, that whenever anyone else mentions it, you can find me staring back at them, fingers in my ears, screaming IKNOWIKNOWIKNOWIKNOWIKNOW!!! because I’m afraid the powers that be will hear them and realize I haven’t had a rough patch in a while and RAIN HELL DOWN UPON ME.

Now that’s not a very perky mindset, is it?

I’m an extremely positive person, but I’m human. I think we as humans – as Americans, especially – sometimes think we don’t deserve all the awesome stuff we’ve been handed.

But let’s be real. We haven’t been HANDED anything.

We’ve worked our butts off. Right!? WE HAVE.

No one is entitled to anything. I get that. But you absolutely deserve it if you work for it.

I can honestly say that I’ve worked HARD for all of these good things.

[Except not dying on my 21st birthday. That may have been pure luck and solid friends.]

So is your family happy and healthy? Do you love your job? Is your personal life in a total sweet spot? Chances are that stuff didn’t land in your lap. Chances are you are doing a rockin’ job at life.

Go you.

We’re always handed sucky suck fest crap. It’s life. People die, car engines start smoking when you have $50 to your name, somebody jealous of your awesome life spreads rumors that aren’t true. That crap sucks. And it’s gonna happen cuz that’s life. But chances are it’s not near as bad as you think it will be. (Except cancer and death. That’s always bad and awful and I’ll vote for the first gubernatorial candidate who votes to veto death and kick cancer to the curb.)

And even if something super awful does happen, what good are you doing worrying about it now? You’re wasting all the good crap!

So to recap:

You are awesome.

Your life is awesome.

Your life is awesome cuz you made it awesome.

Go you.

Now, go celebrate your awesomeness. Thank Jillian Michaels.

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ROBOTS.

Youguysyouguysyouguysyouguyssssss.

I started my job (!!!!). Finally, right!?

I love it. I love it so much. I feel like I’m jumping the gun saying that being as tomorrow is only Day 5 but I am confident I will continues to love it. Lovelovelove.

I really can’t talk about it more than that because I’m afraid I’ll wet myself with excitement.

I also love my apartment.

Lovelovelove.

It is so cute it makes me sick.

I really thought that it would take a while to adjust to living on my own. I was pretty confident that I would go to bed every night ready for murderers to break down my front door with an axe, but I’ve been a Brave Little Toaster up in herrrrr. No bad guy dreams yet. Although tonight I’m watching Burn Notice so if it’s going to happen, it’ll be tonight.

Robots

I said on my Facebook page that my next post was going to talk about robots. I don’t want to disappoint you, but I’m probably going to. I’m not talking about R2D2 or Rosie Jetson, exactly, but something far, far cooler.

Dishwashers.

Yes.

Dishwashers.

I don’t think that people appreciate dishwashers until they don’t have dishwashers. I lived with my parents this summer, and they had a dishwasher, but I spent a lot of time hanging out (read: eating) at Jeff’s. Jeff has no dishwasher. I was all, Glass half full, no dishwasher is fiiiiiiiine, I love washing dishes!!

I LIED.

Dishwashers are the best things ever. Dishwashers make kitchens that look like this:

 

Look like this:

in about 12 seconds.

YOU GUYS.

It is a ROBOT that washes your DISHES.

For you!!

It just washes them while you watch Burn Notice, or edit photos, or WHATEVER .

So then I started thinking about other robots just walking around chilling on Earth. Like Transformers, basically, which I always knew was for real anyway.

Think about cars; robots that drive us places.

Computers; robots that teach us how hard boil an egg and everything else. (Side note: did you know if you start Google’ing, “How to…” boil eggs is one of the first hits? I am probably a contributing factor as I have Googled that topic at least 12 times. Successful egg boil attempts = 3.)

Phones; robots that are basically really advanced can+string communication devices.

Think about that last one though. Think about the first time you and your neighbor/best friend/sibling got your hands on a really sweet can+string phone. Or walkie talkies. Or figured out the vent in one room let you hear almost perfectly what was happening in the room below. How’d it make you feel?

If you’re like me you probably reacted something like this:

FREAKING OUT

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Riiiiiiiight!?

So here is my question: if our 8-year-old selves react like that to two old cans of tomato soup and yarn, why is it that our adult-selves are so much less excited by the completely radical technology we have today?

Eh? Eh?

I am completely guilty. Today when Siri wouldn’t play my Jillian Michael’s podcast and I had to use my FINGER, I was absolutely appalled.

I have to use my FINGER!? And touch this ridiculously sensitive touch screen!? On a device that let’s me call, text, email, tweet and creep on whatever and whoever I want!?

The humanity.

A little perspective for your Thursday night/Friday morning. Go find some soup cans.

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